Review: "On the Plus Side" by Jenny L. Howe

Title: On the Plus Side
Author: Jenny L. Howe
Published: December 2023
Genre: Romance
Rating: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★ 

      Sometimes, a book comes along that absolutely speaks to my soul, and On the Plus Side is one such book. It could've been written specifically for me, aside from the fact that I didn't meet the author, Jenny L. Howe, until this fall (disclaimer: she co-runs the romance book club that I attend, but I have no bias towards her writing despite that). But never have I felt more seen about who I am and what I've experienced, and I was hooked from the first chapter. I initially picked this book up for my sister as a Christmas present, but in a moment of boredom (and not being called by the dozens of other unread books on my shelves?), I started reading it myself... and within 24 hours, I had finished it, bought another copy for my sister, and got both copies signed by the author.

    On the Plus Side features Everly Winters, a fat woman in her mid-20s who's been selected to be on the eponymous reality show for a makeover and confidence boost. In the last few years, especially since her grandmother died and she graduated college, she has lost herself and her confidence. She has been whittled away at by her mother specifically and society in general who want her to be smaller, quieter, less noticeable. She's given up her unique clothing style, her boisterous laugh, her art ambitions. She goes through life quietly, not putting herself out there and not making a fuss.

    Oh, how I relate. For Everly, and myself, her lack of confidence isn't because of her weight; it's because of how everyone has treated her as a result of it, how they've tried to make her smaller in both literal size and how she presents herself. The parts with her mother hurt; her mother, who loves her I'm sure, but who also continues to make comments about how loud she is and how she should put more effort into blending in, how she disapproves of Everly's laugh. A laugh is one of the purest forms of joy, a sign that for a brief moment, Everly forgets to be self-conscious and just enjoys the moment, and her mother tries to dull that! I've been constantly told by my mother that I talk too loud (even though both she and my sister talk much louder than I do), and it's had the effect that it did on Everly: I stop talking. I stop speaking up at all. And, over my lifetime, it has worn me down. So, yeah, this particular bit hit really close to home.

    Throughout the course of the novel, Everly finds not only her confidence, but her courage to stand up for herself, not just in her ambitions but when even one of her refuges treats her poorly. It's such a rewarding thing to see.

   Aside from that, this book is really well written and had me laughing far more than not. The romance isn't instantaneous, but grows over time in a believable way. I never really got the impression that Logan, the love interest, was a "broody, grumpy" character, but rather just someone with resting bitch face (another point I relate to...). I loved seeing his support for Everly, and even his own dilemmas and loyalty didn't detract from his care for her and her story. There was a perfect mini-villain, doing the right thing for all the wrong reasons, and unfortunately I related to being used by someone like that far too much. The reality tv show crew were wonderful, and even had a touch of actual realism brought to the reality tv. It hit all the right notes for me.

    There's actually a bit more that I want to add to this later, like how Everly's journey of rediscovering her sense of style very much follows my own, but for now, I gotta hit save and send so I can dash off to the book release party for Howe's newest title, How to Get a Life in Ten Dates! But this was definitely a rave from me!

The Brilliance of Book Clubs: A Follow-Up to The Merriest Misters

     Last week, I wrote a review for The Merriest Misters, and I plan on going back to that and amending it after this, but tonight I wanted to write a separate post talking about that book and the wonderful experience that book clubs bring. Namely, different perspectives. On Monday, the romance book club met to discuss The Merriest Misters, and we were joined (via zoom) by the author Timothy Janovsky himself. We had a great conversation and touched on many different things, a lot of them very important, but it especially brought to mind that I read this book with a very different perspective and bias than the author and, it turns out, quite a few people in the book club.

romance book club with author Timothy Janovsky

     Now, I will admit time and again that I am not primarily a romance reader, and I'm picky about the genre. So, as a result, I know that a lot of romance books aren't going to be "for me" for whatever reason. Additionally, since I'm not a big romance reader, the nuances of a well-written romance story may escape me, especially when the characters' story doesn't resemble my own experiences at all. I'm not talking romance-wise here (the complete lack of romance in my life would disqualify me from identifying with any romance character if that were the case) but rather life experiences based on race, gender, sexuality, ability, culture, family dynamic, and so on. I'm privileged in some ways (white, grew up in a two parent household until I was 15, fairly able-bodied at this point of my life) and not in others (a host of mental illnesses, queer, my father died when I was 15). I love reading and discussing books with others because they open me up to those other experiences that don't resemble my own, but sometimes I still get hung up on what I expect, with my experiences shaping my view.

Review: "The Merriest Misters" by Timothy Janovsky

 Title: The Merriest Misters
Author: Timothy Janovsky
Published: October 2024
Genre: Romance
Rating: ★ ★ ★ 

    Brief synopsis: Patrick and Quinn are 6 months into their first year of marriage and already having problems. When they accidentally hit Santa Claus over the head with a frying pan, they have to take on the roles of Santa and his jovial spouse. Will a year in the North Pole help them rekindle their romance and find what's truly important? Or is it all just a magical holiday that will melt away when real life problems come back into the fold? 

Review: "There is a Door in This Darkness" by Kristin Cashore

Title: There is a Door in This Darkness
Author: Kristin Cashore
Published: June 2024
Genre: Magical Realism
Rating: ★ ★ ★ ★ ★

     I read There is a Door in This Darkness in August, and have wanted to review it since but kept putting it off for personal reasons. Because honestly... this is the book I needed at the time, as I dealt with my favorite aunt dying from breast cancer, but didn't want to process too heavily as I was in the thick of that. Well, it's now been two months since my aunt died, we've gone through another tumultuous presidential election in the US, and things look bleak as I struggle with my grief. My current situation reflects Wilhelmina's in many ways (although it's not a direct 1:1), so I'm grateful that I read this ahead of time.

    This isn't an easy book. There are plenty of reasons people won't like it, or won't want to read it, or will rate it low. Some are obvious: it's a deeply political book, and many people don't want to read that in their fiction, even people who may agree with the politics presented here. I get it, books can be a great form of escapism... but this isn't one of them. Others may hate this book exactly because of its political stances, to which I say... yeah, not much, honestly. But there are less nefarious reasons people may not like it: it's a deeply uncomfortable book to read, and some people may not be ready to read a book that's centered around the COVID pandemic and the 2020 elections, not to mention the overall theme of grief. That's totally fair. I see and acknowledge that. That being said, I think this is an important story about loss and coming of age in a tumultuous time.

    Above everything else, grief (and hope) is the central theme of There is a Door in This Darkness: as Wilhelmina grieves her beloved aunt Frankie, she also grieves for her country, before both the 2016 election and also the COVID-19 pandemic. She recognizes the grief for her country and her naïveté, but firmly denies her grief for her aunt (who, at the time of the present-day story, died about two years prior). She has pushed that grief aside to focus on caring for her family, and, well, you know what happens when you do that... Or, at least, I know what happens when I push aside my grief and other "inconvenient" feelings.

    Sprinkled in with the "present day" (2020) narrative are memories of various summers that Wilhelmina spent with her aunts. While I'm not a huge fan of flashbacks, I think they're done really well here. They show us the special bond that Wilhelmina had with her aunts (and especially Frankie), and we get to care for all of them through these excerpts. Parts of these memories are woven into the present day story beautifully, making Wilhelmina both face her grief and realize that her family is always there for her, even beyond death.

    I've been a big fan of Kristin Cashore since the first Graceling novel came out in 2008, but fans expecting a book at all similar to that series should temper their expectations. There is a Door in This Darkness is a stark departure from Kristin Cashore's Graceling series, with a real world setting instead of high fantasy. It's a harshly realistic novel, and while the Graceling novels have never shied away from sensitive topics, they're much more visceral here because we've lived this life, or at least something similar. We lived through 2020 and all the medical and political turmoil that came with it. (Readers finding this review 20 years in the future, obviously that might not apply to you. Hopefully.) We remember the fear and, as the election cycle came back around, are living a version of it again. So, yeah, this book hits a lot closer to home in a way that the Graceling novels never could. (Okay, and the setting being a half hour drive from where I grew up and now live again also hits very close to home, but I wasn't talking literally.)

    Readers expecting more like Graceling will be disappointed, but the other trademarks of Cashore's writing shines through. She has always addressed injustices, abuse, and atrocities. The injustices and atrocities are on a broader level here than happening to an individual character like in her other books, but the characters feel the weight of them all the same. And the thing that Cashore does the best, that I praise her for in every single book? Character development. Oh wow, her strength in writing characters' inner journeys really shines through here. Wilhelmina, dealing (badly) with personal grief and national grief, has so much growth that she keeps denying herself... until she can't. And then magic happens.

    Literally.

    And I loved the magic! As a practicing witch, the depiction of magic, of the craft, in this book is amazing to see. Some of it's a little more flashy than we'd ascribe to everyday magic (and yet, nothing is so far out of the realm of possibility) but most of it is just our normal, commonplace craft. Cashore's descriptions of tarot cards were so spot on and beautiful (I'm familiar with all three decks mentioned in the book, and it was great to see more than just the RWS used), as well as just the little ways in which we feel and use energy around us. I would have loved to have three aunts like Wilhelmina's to spend my summers with; I want them even more than the aunts from Practical Magic, and that's saying a lot! But, really, the aunts in general were delightful (and you can see why Wilhelmina's grief over losing one is so profound) and I want to be them both as a witch and as an elder when I grow up.

    So, yeah, I loved There is a Door in This Darkness. It hit a lot of personal notes for me -- from the grief over an aunt, to the political turmoil, to the cunning craft. Wilhelmina's journey resonated deeply; I didn't come of age in 2020 (I'm well past that!) but I also experienced profound loss (of my father) when I was in high school and dealt badly with the grief for a long time, as well as losing my aunt very recently. I also lived through 2020 and all the anxiety that brought with it, and am seeing it repeated now in November of 2024.Again, not a book for everyone, but it is definitely a book for me.

Help! I joined a romance book club?

     You ever do something that's just... not you?

    Well, this week, I did. I joined a romance book club.

    To back up a bit and give you some backstory: I moved in March from Chicago to a small, rural town in Massachusetts. I grew up here, but haven't lived here since I left for college. I've lived in Chicago for 14 years and barely even got home to visit in that time. I had friends growing up, but they've all grown up (as did I), got married and had kids (as... didn't I), and moved away (as did I, until recently). And there just isn't much here, especially in town, in the way of events or... opportunities to meet people and make friends. I've been trying, but it's not like in Chicago where there was a Meetup group for literally whatever your heart could desire (it's how I met quite a lot of my friends there!). No, really; I've scoured Meetup for the area and everything is either in Providence (that has a broken bridge I'd have to cross and sit in traffic to get to), in Boston an hour away, or... not at all. And those groups are just the "normie" groups that every city has, and I don't qualify for half of them (centered around kids' playdates, etc.). So... I've been trying, but it's been overall a lonely six months since I moved.

    So, enter the bookstore. There's a local indie bookstore a few towns over, not exactly close but a half hour away on back roads isn't awful. I LOVE that store, although it's dangerous for my wallet. Very dangerous. Anyway, since they're an indie store, their shelf space isn't the biggest but their selection is impeccable, so I can't really complain. In lieu of a full time library job, if they wanted to hire me, I'd say yes in a heartbeat. (Please...) Also, they have a big event space on the second floor and hold events all the time, where they foster a vibrant community of readers. It's great to see! I saw Sy Montgomery give a talk there a few weeks ago, and she was phenomenal. Anyway, I'm getting off track, but... I really love this store.

    They have two book groups, which sounds like a perfect way to meet people and make friends, right? Right! Except... neither book group is my cup of tea: romance and thrillers. I wish they had a fantasy book group! (But then I'd be picky about that lol, it can't be all nerd guys who don't read women authors, and I wouldn't be very happy if it was all romantasy...) Well, there's no way I'm committing to a thriller book group even if I am absolutely desperate for friends (and I am...), but romance? Eh, we'll see. Not in my top 5 or even 10 genres to read, but I can at least stomach it. And sometimes there are good romances that I enjoy. (My Thoughts On Romance is a whole other blog post that I'll write some day, I promise. And I promise it's not all bookish snobbery; it's mostly just "Eh, it's not for me.")

    Well, this month's book selection for the romance book club just happened to be a book I had already read at the beginning of the year: The Dead Romantics by Ashley Poston. And, bonus, I had actually enjoyed it! I mean, it's a romantic ghost story, so it was almost up my alley? That's borderline fantasy-ish. I looked at my Goodreads review and was like, "You know, I had strong enough opinions about this book that I think I could participate in a discussion", despite having read it almost a year ago and having my terrible memory. (Although, I was rooting for the book to take the "tragic romance" angle rather than "happily every after" ending, so... again, contemporary romance isn't exactly my genre lol.) So, I went last night, in an attempt to socialize and make friends.

    Did I make friends? Ehhh, not really. Did I see some people whose styles indicate I would probably like to be friends with them but then was too shy to actually say anything to them? Absolutely. But, baby steps. I went to the group and participated in the discussion (a lot! actually), and had fun. Everyone was nice and the discussion was a lot of fun. And there were a LOT of people! I didn't count exact numbers, but about 40 people. For a book club! That's an amazing turnout! So like... odds are decent that I could make at least one friend among so many people, right?

    Anyway, I did really enjoy the discussion, so much so that I... picked up the book for the next discussion. So I guess I'm in a romance book club now? Hm. (At least they're going to be picking a romantasy read soon, so that'll be more in my territory lol.)

      I swear this isn't a lengthy veiled attempt at saying "Help, I've been kidnapped." I really did join a romance book club.

Current Reads and DNFs - 10/23/2004

     I've been deep into Minecraft with friends the past couple of weeks, but I've still made some time for reading. And... attempting to read and deciding I really didn't want to read those books after all! But first, let's start with the positive!

"The Games Gods Play" by Abigail Owen

 
    I read The Games Gods Play for my book group's discussion for October, so it was a quarter of the book each week. I think I need to do a full review on this, because I overall really enjoyed the plot, but I have... complicated thoughts about it. When I try to talk about it, I think of all the negative things I didn't like, while I'm like, "I promise I liked it!" Overall, I rated it 3.75 on Storygraph, because the middle of the book didn't really hit, but I am looking forward to the sequel.

"Emily Wilde's Encyclopaedia of Faeries" by Heather Fawcett

     I'm about halfway through Emily Wilde's Encyclopaedia of Faeries, and really enjoying it! However, I'm having a weird time with it because even though I'm genuinely really enjoying it, I... never actually want to pick it up and read it. I like both the writing and the story itself, but I have to really convince myself to sit down and read it instead of anything else in my pile. I think part of it is because the writing style is fairly formal (it's a first person journal by an academic), it's not off-putting really but makes my brain be like, "Ehhh, do we really wanna?" I think this is also why I struggle to sit down and read Jane Austen even though I like what I've read! And I don't even not like the formal writing style, just my ADHD brain wants to put up a fight. Anyway, I know I'm going to like it enough by the end of it (whenever that is) that I've already picked up the sequel and am looking forward to that. (For what it's worth, a friend had the exact same experience with this book. Really enjoyed it but never actually wanted to read it. Weird!) I am, however, switching between the print book and the audiobook (while working in the garden... which is over for the year), which has helped a lot. The audiobook is really well done.

     But, Emily Wilde isn't a flop, and neither was The Games Gods Play, but these two...

"The Village Library Demon-Hunting Society" by C.M. Waggoner and "Chaos at the Lazy Bones Bookshop" by Emmeline Duncan

     I'm sorry to say that I returned both of these to the library today after only reading 30 pages from each. Both were extremely overwritten, something that has been the case with every "cozy mystery" I've tried to pick up. Is that just how the genre is? It's a mystery, leave some stuff up to the imagination! Cozy fantasy doesn't suffer from this (at least the cozy fantasy I've read), so why mystery? I was so disappointed in these and figured that I should return them sooner rather than later since they're brand new and have wait lists. 

a page from "Chaos at the Lazy Bones Bookshop"

     Seriously, you do not need to tell me the main character's entire history with knitting and other creative projects when introducing a minor character. And while I appreciate spreading knowledge about Libro.fm, it (and other internet references and phrases) just seemed shoehorned in. And yes, I understand the irony of me saying this, as my ADHD frequently sends me off on long tangents and explanations and over-explanations, but that's my unedited self. Writing papers or fiction? This just feels like someone was trying to hit their NaNoWriMo word count. (RIP NaNoWriMo by the way, dead in our hearts after they fully announced support for AI writing.)

    Okay, back to the more positive...

Volume 1 of the Animal Crossing: New Horizons manga by Kokonasu Rumba

    For fun and a change of pace, last night I started reading the Animal Crossing manga (there are seven volumes in total, but I only have the first four so far). Now, Animal Crossing is my favorite video game series, and I have put thousands upon thousands of hours into each title in the series. I didn't know what to expect from the manga, and... I'm glad I didn't go in with any expectations, because it is not at all what I would have guessed. Whereas the 2006 Animal Crossing movie, Dôbutsu No Mori, is sweet, heartfelt, and honestly heartbreaking at times, this is... not. It is silly, weird, and definitely made for a younger audience than me. Which is fine! It still made me laugh, especially scenes like Raymond's "museum exhibit":

    So, this week was a bunch of mixed bag, no 5 star reads but at least some that I've been enjoying. But also, I went to the store yesterday to pick up next month's book group book (Weyward by Emilia Hart) and I walked out with four others, so... here's hoping for the near future! Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep? has been on my "to return to" list for 10 years, so it's finally time to return to it! (It's one of the books that were lost when I was homeless.)

Library Tour

     I moved in March, and have spent a lot of time working on my library space since then. Before I moved, the room didn't even have flooring, so I have designed everything from the ground up (with the exception of the fireplace and brick wall). It's been wonderful being able to make this space truly mine, something I haven't been able to do in all my years of renting. It is my "happy place", as the saying goes. As I just brought a lot of my plants inside for the winter, I thought now was the perfect time to take some pictures! The plants get in the way sometimes, but they make it feel cozy. And they'll be outside again in no time! 

    My home library is also a particular point of pride because I lost about half my book collection when I was homeless about 10 years ago, and have painstakingly rebuilt it, most in the past six months. I held onto my absolute favorites (although not all of them), but many, along with my CDs and records, were lost to me. So this has been a labor of love in many ways. I've only felt "stable", housing-wise, in the last few years, and my books quickly outgrew my small apartment once I did, so being able to expand into (almost) a whole room for just my books has been amazing.

    This room is still a work in progress and is subject to change at any moment (case in point: a frame is on order to hang a map of Tortall on that brick wall), but still... this is how it looks today*! Also, a video tour will be coming SoonTM, I just haven't had time to make it this week.

*when I started writing this post on Wednesday. It is now Saturday and books have been added since then.

The entrance (which separates it from my bedroom area) and first view.

    Long view of my main bookcases (we'll get to their contents shortly)

Reading chair and fish tank. There's a (non-working) fireplace behind the fish tank, maybe one day I'll get it fixed up. The fish tank is home to black mollies, dalmatian mollies, a betta, and a gold inca snail.

Other corner: fish tank, "writing desk" (as if I actually write these days... grand plans and all), and my "favorite series" shelf.

    And to round it out, here is the other corner with my computer desk.

    Isn't it cozy? And sure, the pink Victorian-esque aesthetic may not be everyone's cup of tea, but it sure is mine. I still have plans to work on—I want to put tin tiles up on the ceiling, I'm on the hunt for the perfect reading lamp and side table for my drinks, and I'll soon have to figure out separate storage for my CD and DVD collections—but for now, this is coming along quite nicely. The grand plan is to eventually buy the whole house when my mom is ready to retire, in which case I'll move my bedroom and office upstairs, and this will just be a library, with floor to ceiling shelves on the wall opposite the windows... but that's down the line. I still need to find a full time job before that can even happen.

    Now, for the individual bookcases so everyone can peruse my titles and my meticulous organizational system... I mean, that's what you're all here for, right? Right.

    First up, we have one of my nonfiction bookcases. The row on top of the bookcase is mostly books about animals, the arts, and a few biographies. A lot of these books, I've had since I was a child/teen, including my decent collection of Monkees books. (Micky's biography is missing, so I need to replace that.) The other three shelves are full of my witchcraft books, arranged by subject within that: nature magic, crafts, mythology, astrology, tarot, etc.

    Across from that is my other nonfiction bookcase, or what I call my "let's make shit" bookcase. Here are my books on crafts, gardening, cooking, etc. as well as my books on library science on the bottom row. Eventually I'd like to set up a little bookcase in/near the kitchen for my cookbooks, but for now, this is where they rest.

    My "other fiction" bookcase (you'll understand after the next one). Utopian/dystopian novels, manga/comics, Arthurian legends on the top shelf. The second shelf holds my CD collection (almost all rebuilt in the past few months thanks to a couple used record stores nearby). On the third shelf are "realistic fiction", poetry, and classics. The bottom shelf is my "room to grow" shelf with my journals, sticker books, and storage. (Although now I'm looking at it and thinking I should move the CDs down to the bottom shelf, so the small shelf doesn't break up the books and look out of place size-wise... as I said, constant work in progress.) Displayed on top is a book of Middle Earth artwork, my record player, a map of Middle Earth, and my dad's sword that I inherited, along with various decor and a statue of Aphrodite.

    Next to that is my science fiction, fantasy, and magical realism bookcase. The science fiction and fantasy are mixed in together, because I felt I didn't have enough scifi to justify separating them (and Anne McCaffrey blended the two, which would be the bulk of my potential scifi shelf), but magical realism is by itself on the bottom (along with some extra copies of books for giveaways and stuff). Although I'd like to move the magical realism shelf to a taller shelf, because one book (The Long Sandy Hair of Neftoon Zamora by Michael Nesmith) is juuuuust barely too tall for that bottom shelf, and I can make it work but I feel like I shouldn't force it, so that's priority when I get a new bookcase. Anyway, on top of this bookcase is... well, lots of plants, but also The Lost Hero by Terry Pratchett, the only illustrated novel of the Discworld series.

    Think there's a noticeable lack of certain authors on my fantasy bookcase? Never fear, they're probably... on my "favorite series" bookcase!

    This built-in is one of my favorites, both in terms of books on display and aesthetic. (Note: there's also a built-in bookcase on the other side of the fireplace, but it currently holds my DVDs and video games, so I didn't include it in this post. I suspect I'll change it out with books eventually. Like if I ever win the lottery and buy the complete library edition of the Discworld series.) The first two shelves are almost entirely Tamora Pierce, my favorite author of all time, but she does also get to share it with Kristin Cashore's Graceling series. If you're not familiar with Tamora Pierce's works (well, you will be soon by hanging out here!), she writes in two fantasy universes: Tortall and Emelan. The top shelf is Tammy's Tortall works (with space reserved for the looooong awaited sequel to Tempests and Slaughter, which came out in 2017), and the second shelf is her Emelan novels as well as two short story collections. And, as I said, Graceling shares that space. 

an even more updated picture of my Tamora Pierce shelves, as I've been working on collecting the hardcovers I didn't yet have. (I'm done for now since her first series is extremely expensive in hardcover and I'm not too adamant about getting her Emelan books all in hardcover.)

     Underneath that, I have the Witches subseries of Terry Pratchett's Discworld series and quite a lot of Middle Earth books. The edition of Lord of the Rings is my dad's copies passed down from the 70s; they're in very rough shape and I really should get a "readable" copy, but... one day. Underneath that is A Series of Unfortunate Events (the first book is missing because I've lent it to someone, and I'm still working on getting the middle books in hardcover, but it is a complete collection) and Jane Austen's works (which, to be honest, I haven't read, I have grand ambitions one day, but... they match the bookcase too perfectly not to put on here!).

    Below that, L.M. Montgomery's classic Anne of Green Gables series (including the recent graphic novel), although I'm missing one and not all the editions match. Maybe one day. Next to that is the complete TV show The Monkees on VHS, which I saved and saved every penny from my allowance and extra chores when I was 13 to buy. And next to that is a very old edition of the complete works of Shakespeare, which I also inherited from my dad. (Okay, technically I think my sister claimed them but then she moved out for college and I took them. You know how it goes.) And finally, the bottom shelf is just notebooks and storage "decor books"; it's mostly blocked by the litterbox generally so I didn't want to put actual books down there.

    Because a personal library is a living entity, always changing, I've already collected more since these pictures. Thanks, local library book sales! But this is a pretty good representation of the overall appearance of my happy place.